Mental Health is no joke, and you don't know it unless you have really gone through it! More lows than highs, fighting through the dark times, trust me it's deep. Can't Let The Devil 👿 Win!
TUES 21st MARCH ‘2023
Learnt something new today! I did not know that being #indecisive is something that falls under depression!!
But I wouldn't say my indecisiveness is due to fear of failing i.e.
An old work colleague/friend just asked me to join him for a drink. I said yes at first, then I changed my mind until tomorrow (simply being lazy) as can’t be bothered to go back out!
Then I asked him, if you would rather do today then that's fine.
He basically said he doesnt mind, let's do tomorrow I can't be bothered today!
Which is when I said I can be an indecisive person! 🤔
Are you someone that suffers with depression and undecisive too?
BROKE DOWN 😢
SUN 19th MARCH ‘2023
Was multi-tasking sat watching ‘call the midwife’ while typing out my 20yrs (2003) diary.
Then the next thing I know I've broken down in tears 🙈 maybe reflecting back on my life from reading my diary back then and life now... 🤷♀️
AGAIN 😒 WTF 🥺😤
MON 13th JUNE ‘2022:
I can not believe what the hell I am seeing stuck on the front door of the rented house-share accommodation that I have lived at for 5 and a half years!
A REPOSSESSION ORDER! WTF
REALLY! This was meant to be the last place I rent with the vision of being able to buy 🤷♀️ one day but certainly not have to find somewhere else to live again. My head is doing overtime!
Knowing that this year alone living with x2 Narcissists an ex and an obsessed housemate 🤮 who have just put their toxic scents in this house!
Maybe it's gods way of saying remove yourself from this house now, which I agree but in my own time when things are on a up, not when I barely know if I am coming or going. This is too much!
I know the devil 👿 is going to try and make me get lower than low and I pray and going to try my hardest but it's not easy, more so when you have moved as many times as I have like a Black Gypsy / Traveller. No joke!